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Chicago
Jan. 6th, 2008 | 11:47 pm
location: Bed
mood: 
anxious
I am excited for this weekend. I get to see the bf and we are gonna probably figure out what we are gonna do with our relationship.
I want him to want me to move to Chicago in the fall. It took me moving across the country to figure out that I want to be with him. I won't move to Chicago unless we move in and that may be too much for him. So I'm a little scared.
I have to plan my wardrobe. It has to be perfect. I feel like I'm auditioning.
I want him to want me to move to Chicago in the fall. It took me moving across the country to figure out that I want to be with him. I won't move to Chicago unless we move in and that may be too much for him. So I'm a little scared.
I have to plan my wardrobe. It has to be perfect. I feel like I'm auditioning.
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Back
Nov. 21st, 2007 | 09:56 pm
location: Dallas
mood: 
sad
I start my new job soon. I'm excited. No more winter. But who cares about that.
I'm sad as hell. I really think I'm in love with him and now I'm 1200 miles away starting a new life because I was embarrassed about my old one. I'm going to lose him because of the distance. I want to be with him. I'm scared I'm making a huge mistake. Now that I'm here and about to start all of this....I don't want to be here. I don't want to live with my Mom. I feel like a failure.
I'm sad as hell. I really think I'm in love with him and now I'm 1200 miles away starting a new life because I was embarrassed about my old one. I'm going to lose him because of the distance. I want to be with him. I'm scared I'm making a huge mistake. Now that I'm here and about to start all of this....I don't want to be here. I don't want to live with my Mom. I feel like a failure.
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Out of Shape
Nov. 11th, 2007 | 06:57 pm
location: My 127lbs body
mood: 
bored
music: Britney Spears - Gimme More
I sometimes like to pretend I'm still in amazing shape. Tonight I decided to really dance it out to Gimme More in the living room. I had like, a chest burn afterwards. So I did it again.....felt good. Missing my 17-year-old body and energy but I think she's still in there somewhere.
I'm 127lbs today. I'd like to get back to 115lb but then none of my jeans would fit anymore. I have like, 15 pairs of Sevens and Citizens that I'm still paying off. So maybe 120lbs would be good....work on my stomach mostly. Used to have a fierce stomach....a "Hot Britney" stomach. Come back to me!
I'm hoping to get a job offer tomorrow. I feel good about it but who knows. If I get it I have to fly back to Madison to get my car and stuff. It will be really really nice to see my friends again and party. I'm lonely here. Missing Joe. Wasting away at 23.
I'm 127lbs today. I'd like to get back to 115lb but then none of my jeans would fit anymore. I have like, 15 pairs of Sevens and Citizens that I'm still paying off. So maybe 120lbs would be good....work on my stomach mostly. Used to have a fierce stomach....a "Hot Britney" stomach. Come back to me!
I'm hoping to get a job offer tomorrow. I feel good about it but who knows. If I get it I have to fly back to Madison to get my car and stuff. It will be really really nice to see my friends again and party. I'm lonely here. Missing Joe. Wasting away at 23.
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Real Housewives
Nov. 10th, 2007 | 06:14 pm
location: Dallas
mood: 
discontent
Can I just say how much I love yet hate this show?
I love it because I want that life and hate it because I don't have that life. Ultimate envy.
At least I'm in warm weather now in a bigger city. That's something I've wanted. Living in Highland Park would be the ultimate dream if I stayed in Dallas. That area is so amazingly beautiful. I drove through the other day and saw so many cute kids playing on the front lawns of multi-million dollar homes, having a great time and not realizing how incredible their life is. Envy again.
I've got an envy problem. There haven't been too many times when I've loved my life. I left one the last one of those periods about 6 months ago. The envy has really started to kick in. Watching The Hills, seeing Jim and Pam on The Office, etc. Oy envy.
I'll get back on top.
I love it because I want that life and hate it because I don't have that life. Ultimate envy.
At least I'm in warm weather now in a bigger city. That's something I've wanted. Living in Highland Park would be the ultimate dream if I stayed in Dallas. That area is so amazingly beautiful. I drove through the other day and saw so many cute kids playing on the front lawns of multi-million dollar homes, having a great time and not realizing how incredible their life is. Envy again.
I've got an envy problem. There haven't been too many times when I've loved my life. I left one the last one of those periods about 6 months ago. The envy has really started to kick in. Watching The Hills, seeing Jim and Pam on The Office, etc. Oy envy.
I'll get back on top.
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(no subject)
Nov. 10th, 2007 | 02:37 pm
location: Dallas
mood: bored
music: Common - I Want You
I'm stuck in the house by myself all weekend. LAME.
No car, no money, no friends. But I swear I'm gonna get into the Dallas social scene somehow. Gotta get back on top. Hopefully I land one of these jobs. That's step one. Then meet some people...meet some guys. Laugh again. Be fucked up again. Be 23 again.
Left my on again off again boyfriend in Madison....had to start a new life. Miss our social life. Miss feeling like a queen. Miss watching AD and Sunny together. If we aren't meant to be....well that will be a bummer but okay. Ugh...the girl that gets him will be one lucky bitch.
No car, no money, no friends. But I swear I'm gonna get into the Dallas social scene somehow. Gotta get back on top. Hopefully I land one of these jobs. That's step one. Then meet some people...meet some guys. Laugh again. Be fucked up again. Be 23 again.
Left my on again off again boyfriend in Madison....had to start a new life. Miss our social life. Miss feeling like a queen. Miss watching AD and Sunny together. If we aren't meant to be....well that will be a bummer but okay. Ugh...the girl that gets him will be one lucky bitch.